"No one is always gorgeous. No one is always sexy. But love is a DECISION. Waiting to see whether someone is good enough is childish, and it is BOUND to make the other person feel on some level as though they’re auditioning for the part. In that space, we feel nervous, and when we’re nervous, we’re not at our best. The ego is looking for someone attractive enough to support. The mature and miracle-minded among us support people in BEING attractive. Part of working on ourselves, in order to be ready for a profound relationship, is learning how to SUPPORT another person in being the best that they can be. Partners are meant to have a priestly role in each other’s lives. They are meant to help each other access the highest parts within themselves.
I’ve been with men who never seemed to think I was good enough. I’ve also been with men who were smart enough to say, “You look beautiful tonight” often enough for it to bolster my self-esteem and help me show up for life in a more beautiful way. None of us are really objectively attractive or unattractive. There is no such thing. There are people who MANIFEST the potential for sparkle that we all share, and those who don’t. Those who do are usually people who some where along the line, either from parents or lovers, were told verbally or nonverbally, “You’re wonderful and beautiful.” Love is to people what water is to plants."